


Falling

by KoibitoDream



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Future, Crushes, Falling In Love, Getting Together, Half Drabble, M/M, Possible Unrequited Feelings, Writing Exercise, dork in denial, doubting oneself, emotional denial, hiding ones feelings, not so slow burn, the unlikeliest of friendships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-28
Updated: 2016-08-04
Packaged: 2018-07-27 08:23:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 2,845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7610752
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KoibitoDream/pseuds/KoibitoDream
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>If you're wondering where the fuck this guy came form, welcome to the club. Have some soda and snacks.</p><p>(If Ushijima can be Villain TM, Oikawa Grand Asshole TM, then this Sakusa guy can be freely interpreted until further notice too, I think. Because why the fuck not.)</p>
        </blockquote>





	1. To doubt oneself

There are things he's not sure he should have noticed.

The way he smiles so it reaches his eyes, the way he jumps to block that ball, the way he speaks, the tone of his voice, the degree of his scowl when he's pissed, the way his light hair has grown out and looks so great on him this way, the way he raises his brow when he's thinking about something.

The new headphones he wears that are so similar to the old ones, but they are not the same. The way he interacts with others, the subtle change in his attitude, it's all there for Tobio to see. And he does.

His problems start when he's not so sure that all the different things he sees are all that necessary for him to know. As a setter and as merely a team mate. (He highly doubts even that is his rank in his eyes.)

But he can't not see them.

By the time he realises it, he's far too gone. Two steps too deep.

The more he thinks about it, the more he's sure that nothing good will come out of it.

He barely got the hang out the whole team mate thing and not stepping on a land mine every damn time he speaks and now this?

No, nothing good can come from the fact that he, Kageyama Tobio, has a crush on Tsukishima Kei.

 

Impossible.

 

Nope. No way. He refuses. No.

Absolutely out of the question.

Why him of all people?

Like he hasn't enough to worry about in the first place.

 

That, and Tsukishima is not stupid. He'll get to the bottom of this weird behaviour of his before he'll know it. He can only hope his resting bitch face won't give away anything. Preferably for the rest of their senior year. It worked so far.

 

But then Tsukishima walks in the gym one evening after practice, when no one is there, save Kageyama himself, doing some extra work to see how it will go.

 

_The moment their eyes meet, Kageyama knows he's screwed._

 


	2. To question

_What the fuck did he get himself into this time?_

Is the question that Kageyama Tobio has yet to find the right answer for.

 

He doesn't get it. Simple as that. (He thinks as he stands by the vending machine, waiting for his daily dose of milk to emerge from the thing.)

 

He doesn't get why he notices all the things he does. He's never noticed those things – no. Wait. He _does_ notice things about others. He notices how beautiful Suga-san is, but that's a well known fact. He notices how Yamaguchi's freckles become him, but that's also some sort of common sense. _His_ common sense at least. He notices the small things that make a person...that are part of the person and help form who they are.

Hmm...maybe a... reformulation of the question is in order. (He sips on the milk, arching a brow.)

 

He doesn't get why he spots more traits and small things when it comes to Tsukishima. Way more things than he notices by Hinata and Hinata is the ace.

 

He muses over that one for a while but ends up with nothing. (The empty milk carton ends up in the trash bin when he's done.)

 

It doesn't make sense. At all.

Okay, so they end up standing next to each other when blocking the opponent's ball on occasions but somehow that just doesn't seem to be the right answer.

_But what else could it be?_

 

Oh.

 

It's the fact that they share similar music tastes. But of course. When he found out that one, he must have looked for signs of other things they might have in common. Right?

 

...close...but not enough.

 

That part is way closer to the desired feeling of revelation but it still doesn't add up. He still doesn't feel the revelation of a correct answer, the light, liberation, confidence boosting feeling one has when finally getting something. Akin to the feeling of finally getting that stupid maths problem right. Or something like that. (It's the closest thing he can think of right now.)

It's not that it bothers him enough for him to lose sleep, but it's still present nonetheless.

He's reminded of that fact, of the eluding answer, every time he discovers something new.

 

_But what is it?_


	3. To find out

“What's bothering you, Tobio?” Sakusa asks as Kageyama picks up the phone.

 

“ _...since when do you talk over the phone?_ ” Kageyama asks, confused. Especially since he knew he had a thing for keeping things germ free and apparently talking over the phone could cause the bacteria in your ear to grow. (There was actually an article covering that subject, but Kageyama is still not sure if that's true.)

 

“I cleaned it today, so I'll live.” Sakusa says coolly.

“ _Oh._ ”

“Is it about that thing we talked about last time?”

“ _...yeah._ ”

“So you finally figured it out.”

“ _I have a feeling I should have just ignored it._ ”

“Why would you do that?”

“ _...you've met me._ ”

 

Oh, yeah. He remembers. How could he forget the day a kid walked up to him and dubbed him Mr. Average and not even mean it as an insult, like who does that? This kid could be scary in the most unexpected of ways.

 

“True, but that doesn't excuse anything.”

“ _I don't want this to be a rejection._ ”

 

Oh, bold words for goodie two shoes.

Except goodie two shoes is now a third year and made quite a few people regret their life decisions (of course by accident, in his own Kageyama Tobio way) but even that doesn't save him from the troubles of having scary crushes on people he himself deems as _not gonna happen._

 

“I'm sure you don't.”

_No one does. Especially Sakusa doesn't want that one to crash and burn before it even starts. Not after what that kid's been through. Seriously, this kid gets in too many troublesome situations for anyone's good._

“Tell you what”, he says, amusement evident in his voice, “if it goes to shit, I'll lend you my shoulder to cry on.”

“ _You won't touch a door knob after someone and you'll lend me a shoulder to cry on?_ ”

 

Yes, because you're too pure for this cruel, cruel world.

 

He doesn't say that out loud though. But Kageyama can tell.

 

“ _Why are you so different from what you look like?_ ”

“Says a person who looks like they could kill you but is actually the purest cinnamon roll ever.”

“ _Ha-ha._ ”

“Like you're not.” Sakusa leans against his chair, moving he phone from his ear a bit.

 

But seriously, if that middle blocker has anything against the prospect of dating him, he might consider filling the gap.

 

…

 

He really needs to get his shit together.

 

Any way.

 

“You can always choose to bottle up everything and hope you don't explode.” He then offers, oh so smart and mature. “Or bottle everything up and discover that you have wonderful mental self-control.”

“ _So I should ignore it then?_ ”

“What? No. Don't you dare. You hear me?”

“ _Yes, I hear you._ ”

“Good.” The curly haired man nods to himself. “Now listen. Subtle play is not your game as we all know all too well, so I suggest you just walk in and do your own thing – being awkward and ridiculously frank when they least expect it – and hope for the best.”

“ _Shouldn't I at least try subtle?_ ”

“Absolutely not.”

Because everyone knows that you ain't jack shit until you pass the trail of hell fire that is the first impression of Kageyama Tobio. Fighting the Nameless King from DS3 was way easier than getting through the King of the Court's defence walls. Once you get pass that, nothing else ever seems like a decent challenge.

But. By all means.

Go ahead, Tobio.

_Make them bleed._

 

And now Sakusa is getting distracted again.

 

“Hey, if you're not ready yet for it, don't force yourself.” He says, getting his rubber keyboard out of the drawer.

“ _I know._ ”

 

He finally puts the phone down on the desk and switches to speaker mode.

 

“ _Now tell me about your day.”_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're wondering where the fuck this guy came form, welcome to the club. Have some soda and snacks.
> 
> (If Ushijima can be Villain TM, Oikawa Grand Asshole TM, then this Sakusa guy can be freely interpreted until further notice too, I think. Because why the fuck not.)


	4. To accept

People often refer to falling in love with someone as a nice, wonderful, liberating feeling.

 

_It's not._

_It's fucking terrifying._

 

Especially if you don't have much of a positive history with people and no people skills in general. And now that he thinks about it, he can hardly remember anyone whom he had a positive start with. Maybe Iwaizumi Hajime. Maybe. He can't really recall.

He's way too mortified as it is.

The unravelling of the mystery that were his own feelings began with an unexpectedly sent text to Sakusa Kiyoomi. And by unexpected, he means _how the fuck did this happen as he stares horrified at the little notification that read sent._

Another person he ticked off the moment they first exchanged words. It's kinda his trademark when meeting new people  _he'd like not_ to piss off right off the bat. So far, no luck with that one. Thankfully it turned out great this time around. Maybe the Lady of Decent People Skills finally took pity on him.

Like, Universe, give him a break.

But the Universe is again being a little shit and has him fall in love with Tsukishima Kei. (Did he mention they also didn't have a good start with? No. Well.  _Surprise, surprise._ )

Anyone else would have known right away. Or at least in some time frame considered normal.

Unfortunately, he's  _not_ anyone else.

He's  _Kageyama Tobio_ .

The one who's about 20,000 miles deep under before he gets that he's under. The one that walks in a straight line and then blinks and then he's suddenly somewhere in the middle of an ocean. How? When? Why?

Nobody knows.

 

Thinking about it in detail is  _even worse_ than realising one's in love.

It feels like finally getting somewhere only to kick oneself right in the face the moment it starts going rather well. A disaster. A disastrous disaster. The mother of all disasters.

But what takes the crown (great, now even a king pun, really?) is that he knows deep, deep,  _deep_ down that he doesn't want this to crumble into oblivion. This is a highly possible rejection he  _really_ doesn't  _want_ to experience.

He'd like to keep that bond in tact.

 

_But, as all things of that nature, that is not something he can do._

_Because despite his usual handling things, subtle play is something he's...actually good at. When he's not thinking about it. And having other things to worry about is the bittersweet irony of this predicament he's in. Because he doesn't think about the subtle._

 

_Which brings him to this situation._

 

_Where he stands in the middle of the court, alone, and in front of him is Tsukishima Kei with an unreadable expression._

 

_Thanks, Universe._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. Two chappies in the same day. Much progress. Very yes.


	5. To reach a conclusion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nothing's ever easy with him, is it?

Truth be told, Tsukishima figured what his deal was a long time ago. His initial reaction to it was flat out rejection. He'll admit that.

But.

Dealing with Kageyama Tobio and his crush was everything but what one would expect.

 

He wasn't making a big deal out of it or being annoying; in fact, Kageyama had no idea what was going on in his own head. Nothing new there, but it did open up a window of opportunity for Tsukishima that even Tsukishima didn't quite understand at first.

With Kageyama taking forever to get what was going on, Tsukishima had more than plenty of time to think about stuff.

He got to see some new sides to Kageyama that he would have missed otherwise. The fact that Kageyama had no qualms over being his usual self and bicker with Tsukishima like nothing else was going on was reassuring, in it's own way.

Which was funny, in the long run.

Instead of burning that bridge, Tsukishima caught himself drawn to it, extremely tempted to cross it. Instead of being annoyed and uncomfortable with this newfound attention and interest, Tsukishima found that he...rather liked it. It wasn't intrusive nor suffocating or anything else that he's either seen on TV or on the streets, when people start getting clingy and embarrassing and whatever else, no.

Things went on as usual, with no sudden changes that could have made him uncomfortable.

( _Now that he thinks about it, he fell for Kageyama based on the latter's ignorance of his own feelings. What the heck?_ )

( _Yamaguchi had a good laugh, at least._ )

Eventually, though, things did start to change.

 

And those changes left Tsukishima confused but not in the way he had expected. ( _Nothing is simple with Kageyama Tobio, he notes, that simpleton is far too complicated than he should be._ )

He began to slip into general states of mild panic and confusion and downright horror. One time he visibly shuddered while thinking about something but then dismissed it quickly after. Tsukishima never would have thought that the realisation of being in love would cause such turmoil's in him. Then again, he can't say he doesn't understand why that is.

 

He met himself.

Add the usual interaction between them and you get a very clear picture as to why Kageyama has a crisis.

 

That made Tsukishima feel a lot more offended than he thought possible. And slightly guilty.

Granted, a few months back, he'd be the total opposite and wreck the poor kid before he had time to get him self together (only to regret it.)

Not now though.

Now, he'd like to know Kageyama better. He'd like to let him get to know him better, too.

Kageyama, for all that he is, makes it so easy. To like him and to be liked back. He knows that now and all thanks to Kageyama and his inability to grasp some things. Talk about turning the tables.

 

But then Tsukishima realises that somehow, Kageyama went on ahead and concluded that he'll probably get rejected if he says something. (Again, he knows why that is but it still pisses him off.)

 

“God, he's so aggravating.” Tsukishima mutters, rubbing his temples out of sheer frustration after piecing together all that he knows.

 

Enough was enough.

Kageyama made some conclusions and Tsukishima would really be an idiot if he expected him to act like he wasn't Kageyama Tobio. He's grateful he made it this far.

 

_It takes two to tango, or so they say._

 


	6. To meet in the middle

It takes two to tango, yes.

What Tsukishima didn't expect is for Kageyama to be an excellent dancer. (Though he has some suspicions about that bastard's influence – Sakusa is  _not_ that impassive like he likes to present himself.)

 

But never mind that.

 

It's not about who teaches you the steps, it's about whit whom you chose to dance in the end.

All of a sudden, there is no one but them there, on the floor, at quite a distance.

It's starts of more as the minuet dance, really, with the amount of circling the have done until they reached a middle where they're both comfortable. Taking your time with some things adds to the thrill, making you more relaxed in some aspects and you can move freely when you finally meet.

_What do you expect? How do you see this?_

Once those basic questions are answered, the real show can start. The first step is a rather bold step of a outside closed side tango, not too close but there, testing out where it could go. In case someone isn't comfortable enough, it's easy to move away. Again, the only move they make is to switch to the outside open side, closer but not quite there.

This time around, all the cards are in the open.

 

_A look, a smile, the right touch..._

 

A little spin and they're face to face, following each other's lead. A few little deviations follow, a hand sliding down a back, wrapping around a waist as they get even closer, the pace changes and it's no longer the set one but their own.

After a while, it resembles a few dances but it's fully their own by now, the rhythm their own heart the only thing that matters.

They learn to let go at the right time, only to be rewarded by a new step, a new move, a finger beckoning them to step closer, to join in.

It's around Tsukishima's birthday that they have all the steps down. (And a few people ripping out their hairs to get on with it already.)

 

There's a question Tsukishima waits for.

There's a question that Kageyama would like to pose.

 

_They're on their way back from practice and the background is fucking perfect for cheese and romance. You know, the sight of the setting sun, painting the world in burning oranges and slight pinks and you just can't miss the damn opportunity, no matter how much you're incapable of getting things otherwise._

 

“ _Is there anything you'd like for your birthday?” He blurts out, stopping in the middle of his step, slightly unsure whether he made the right one._

 

_But Tsukishima merely smiles._

 

“ _You.”_

 

**Author's Note:**

> Happy b-day to me, have a wonderful day.


End file.
